Week 5

That's how I felt, just add stretch marks

So, this is the week where I complete my measurements and monthly weigh in.  I faced today with trepidation.  Honestly I may feel better but I want to see a difference in my body.  No matter what I say I am still obsessed with being overweight, like most American women.  I chose to take some pictures, but I think I will wait until I have hit my target weight goals to share them.  Yes, I'm embarrassed about how I looked without something covering my stomach.  In the words of a new friend of mine, Clothes hide a lot!

Alright.  So first I need to comment on my lack of a post last week.  Honestly I was too busy.  I weighed in at 192 lbs and had a bad week.  I overate at 3 dinners and didn't work out 3 times.  I also had 2 beers Saturday night.  So, basically I half fell off the wagon for the week and gained 1.5 pounds.  That is so sad :-(

I did better this past week.  I didn't overeat once, although I went to a birthday party yesterday and ate cake and pizza.  I also didn't have time to exercise at all yesterday.  But I weighed in today at 189 lbs!

My monthly weigh in puts me at 8 pounds lost.  My measurements say I lost 3 inches this month, all in my breasts and hips.  My waist didn't budge.  I was very disappointed in the measurements.  But I guess I should have expected it.  I can see the weight coming off in my hands, arms, neck, face and legs.  So I guess that doesn't leave much for my breasts, waist or hips, huh?

Yes, I'm disappointed in the measurements but I will not give up.  I'm going to stay on this program and continue to set goals.  I know it's working, I just have a lot of weight to lose all over.  My stomach will be the last to go I'm sure.  I have a long way to go and I know it.  This is only the beginning!

And I do look better, I feel better.  I can keep up with my daughter and climb stairs without losing my breath.  I have muscles in my legs that I have never had.  My arms are muscular like back when I was a waitress.  And even if I haven't lost any weight in my belly I have muscles under all that fat that weren't there before.  I'm sleeping better and as I've already said my depression is better.

My goals for next month are simple.  I want to lose 9 pounds  in the next 5 weeks, I want to weigh in at 180 pounds.  I want to lose 5 inches by next month.  Pre pregnancy weight is 175 lbs!  That is my first goal weight, and is hopefully only two months away.

I hope I can help others lose weight.  This week I plan to find the time to write about my eating program and hunger.  I wish you luck in your weight loss goals.

How I Beat My Depression

That was definitely me

I've talked a lot about depression in my blog and I'd be lying if I didn't admit I had it even before my daughter came along.  But since becoming a parent it has been much worse, although until 3 months ago I didn't realize how bad it had been.

I didn't have the classic symptom of disinterest in things I love.  Just happens that two of my favorite things are video games and reading.  Both of those keep your butt firmly planted on your couch.  So, because of that I never noticed how bad I was but now I look back and can't believe the life I've lived for the past 3 years, and the life I've given my daughter.

In the past few years, unless it was a special occasion I only left the house once a week to go to the grocery store and maybe every other week to go to a playgroup meeting for Kaylee.  Yes, that is it.  So in 30 days we would leave the house 6 days.  We didn't even play in the yard.  We sat inside and played, read and enjoyed each other.  In some ways you'd think this was okay (I did).  After all, I wasn't ignoring my daughter.  We spent hours together playing, laughing and learning.  But we weren't getting fresh air, sunlight or time with other human beings.

I also suffered from horrible mood swings, bouts of crying, I was quick to anger and I had no energy.  I knew all of these things were because of depression but thought they weren't hurting anyone but me.  Also, without health insurance, what could I do?

So, 3 months ago I decided to revamp my lifestyle, starting with diet and exercise.  All of which I've already written about earlier in this blog as well.  When I did those things I didn't want to sit around the house anymore so I started taking Kaylee to playdates 3 times a week (at least).  It no longer seemed like such a big deal to go out that often. 

How did I beat depression?  I'm not sure which it was that finally tripped the trigger, but combine all of these and I guess I have my cure.  Daily exercise, eating right, losing weight, sunlight, socializing and eating fish.  I pretty much started doing them all at the same time. 

But so far so good.  If I had a doctor I might be able to go off my meds.  I'll admit I'm still occasionally moody (usually before my period) and there are days where I feel blah.  But now on blah days I just tell myself to shut up and get out of the house.

This hasn't just impacted me either.  My daughter is happier, less whiney, sleeps better and throws less fits.  I will not go back to being that person I was before and am honestly a little frightened for winter.  It's not just for me, it's for her.  I'm a much better parent now than I was then and that is very important to me.

Are you suffering from depression?  Don't suffer alone.  See your doctor, talk to your significant other, tell your friends.  Get help.

Week 3 Weigh In

The dreaded scale face

I have become a dreaded scale addict.  I find myself stepping on that dang thing sometimes 5 times a day.  Don't make this mistake!  It's really disheartening to see your weight go up and down all week.  I think this week I'm going to give it to my husband to hide.

So how did I do?  I weighed in today at 190.6.  That is 1.8 lbs lost this week, a total of 7 lbs since I started the new program.  It's a total of 33 lbs since having my daughter.  I'm so excited to have hit this round number that I jumped for joy and felt like gushing it to strangers. 

My next real goal is to hit pre-pregnancy weight, which is 170 lbs.  Pre-Tom weight is 160.  My personal ideal weight is 155.  Don't me started on BMI, I am doing a blog on that later this week.

I think why I'm so proud of myself is that this is the first time in my life that I'm making the right choices.  I'm not trying fad diets, diet pills or meal replacement.  This is all me and my determination to change my lifestyle.  It's not just about being thin again, it's about being healthy.  For the first time in my life I'm eating healthy portion sizes and making healthy food and snack choices.  I'm making tough decisions like cutting out soda and not splurging on eating out.  When I do get fast food I order based off of the calories I can afford to intake.  I'm eating wheat pasta, bread and crackers.  Light miracle whip and turkey instead of mayo and pastrami.  The only change I tried to make and just can't do?  I tried that veggie pasta, and it is absolutely gross. 

So, I'll be checking back again next week.  I'm hoping to keep up with 1.5 lbs a week, so my goal for next week is to be 189! 

Putting the Weee in your Weight Loss Program

All week long I've been talking about the exercise program that I stole out of a Prevention magazine and how much it's helping me not only lose weight but get in shape.  I saved the most important part of the workout for last, I guess you could say the whole program would be nothing without it. 

Like I've said before my exercise program has 3 parts; cardio, strength and interval.  The interval part is what I had never heard of and had to go research because I just didn't believe it.  An interval workout tricks your body into burning calories for 24 to 48 hours after you're done with your workout.  Sounds too good to be true right? 

Well, it's a reality.  You can hack your body this way and boost your weight loss.  So what is this magical program you may ask?

That is really the best way to explain it to you.  Just put it right out for you.  Basically you're alternating between 3 exercises and heart rates.  By doing this you can optimize you're weight loss.  But don't think this is easy, because it's not.  I'm not even able to do the jumping jacks at all (big busted) so I just circle back around to the other parts.

I even have an app that I'm able to enter my interval workout into so that it can keep track and tell me when to change up.  I have an android phone and the app is called "A Hiit Counter".  That is not a mistype the name is "A Hiit Counter".

Well, today was the end of the fitness routine posts.  I hope I've helped some others out there.  Tomorrow is week 3 weigh in and I'm looking forward to posting my results.

Oh, by the way, I'm not a licensed doctor or fitness instructor, please talk to your doctor before beginning any new workout routine (phew).

Give me Strength

He's doing better than I do

I did strength exercises in high school...  Yeah that's it.  I've never seen a reason for it.  After all, I don't want to be a body builder or have huge bulging muscles (that would look funny on someone who is 5 foot though).  That is a huge mistake.  With the right strength routine you can help boost your weight loss potential and you can target certain areas.

 

Here is the series that I've been using.  For people who haven't read this full series this is a routine for women created to target stubborn belly fat.  I'm not saying that men can't do it or that if you have a flat tummy it's not for you.  But this workout is designed with women in mind because we burn fat differently then men do.

Description of the workout

 Okay, I already gave you most of this in the previous entries but I thought I'd put it on here.  If it's not big enough for you to read just click on it to enlarge the picture.  All of these images are scanned from the Prevention magazine.

I found when I started out that I couldn't hold my head up for this one.  So in the beginning I kept my head on the floor.  After 2 weeks I was able to hold my head while I performed the exercise.  Remember to be careful not strain your neck.

I do not have a smile on my face while I do that workout

The first one's pretty easy, but the second is again something I struggled with.  I was only able to do 5 in the beginning and I still struggle to make it to 10 after 3 weeks.

I don't have a special ball for exercise 2, I actually used my daughter's playground ball.  She has lots of them and didn't seem to mind at all!

This chick is way too happy

I still struggle with this one.  I'm still only able to hold it for 30 seconds after weeks of practicing.  But I refuse to give up and am thinking of adding more arm exercises to my routine.

There is a lot of debate surrounding sit ups.  If you have a bad back then use an exercise ball for this one.  But these are more like roll ups because you are meant to take your time.  It's almost like a mixture of yoga and sit ups.  This is another place I'm behind, I'm able to complete 3 without help but after that my daughter sits on my feet for me.  She has fun and gets to be involved.

The exercise where you lie on your belly is very important.  Do not skip this.  No matter how tired you are.  When you exercise you have to work the opposing muscles of a group or you will hurt yourself.  So, make sure you don't skip this one, no matter what. 

As you can see this is a great strength routine because it's for all fitness levels.  I started doing 5 reps in each area and now I'm up to 10.  After having a child you are likely to not have any belly muscles.  The only way you're going to change that is to slowly rebuild those muscles.  While you're rebuilding those muscles you'll also be burning fat in that belly roll area.  Yes, we all have one after pregnancy and this is a serious problem area for all women.

Don't forget to never do a strength routine 2 days in a row.  Your muscles need a day to repair themselves.  And remember that I am not a licensed health professional so please see your doctor before beginning any new routine.

Also, if you are building muscles as well as burning fat then the scale might not move as quickly as you like.  Muscle weighs more than fat.

*Please note all exercises pictures are scanned directly from Prevention magazine.

Get off the Couch

This is totally me (she has better hair).  Yum, those donuts look good.

I know how comfortable that couch is.  Trust me, mine has butt imprints from where I spent the last 3 years eating, watching TV and using my laptop.  Oh alright, sometimes I got up to cook and spend time with my kid.

So, yesterday I wrote about what program I'm using.  Today I have a little more time so I'll go ahead and detail the running portion.

Cardio

You really can use anything for this that gets your heart rate up into your target range.  If you don't know what that means, or what your target range is, check it out here.  I tried a few of those dance workouts, discovered that I the rhythm of a bear on ice and gave it up after a week.  So instead I started using couch to 5K.  It's a system that helps sedentary people who have never run learn how to.

There is a lot of debate out there about how healthy running is for your body.  It can damage your joints over time, but usually the only people who show joint damage are those who run marathons.  I don't think I will be doing that anytime soon.  There are amazing health benefits to running though.  Especially for women.  New studies are showing that women who run have less bone density issues as they age, which is a particular problem with our group.  If you really aren't interested in running as your cardio then try out some workout DVD's.  I used the streaming ones on Netflix.  A lot of these are low impact but will still get you going.  Swimming is great too!

Couch to 5K has you walk and run alternately.  Check out the full details here on it.   It increases your running time every week just a little.  Eventually you'll be able to run 5K!  Well, I've never made it that far.  I'm on week 3 right now.

You can do cardio everyday if you choose.  I do.  It's very healthy for you and it only takes 30 minutes out of your day.  I feel more energetic and sleep better.  My depression is better, even my allergies seem better.

I don't have a treadmill and to be honest I don't like them.  I like setting my own pace.  But I have an almost 3 year old and live in a neighborhood where I can't just go outside and run.  Very rural where the speed limit may read 45, but you know everyone goes 65.  I've let this be my excuse for far too long.  It's 20 paces from my living to the end of my hallway.  I'm running that.  Yes, I look silly running back and forth but my toddler certainly doesn't care, does she?  I'm also pretty certain that I'm not getting the same health benefits that I would if I didn't have to turn around every 20 paces, but who cares as long as I'm running?  If I had stairs in my house I would do those instead.

I already know what your excuses may be.  I have bad ankles, bad knees, I get tired too quick.  You know what?  I have stuff wrong with me too and I discovered that when I pushed past it I felt better.  My bad knee and hip are feeling better than they have since I had my daughter.

When have you had enough? 

I asked my husband this.  He knows how to run.  He was in Police Academy so he's trained to do this stuff.  You know that time where you feel like you're dying in the middle of a run?  That's called hitting the wall.  Don't stop, just push through it.  When he told me that I thought he was insane.  Then I tried it.  Alrighty then...  Yeah if I just kept going in a few moments the "oh my god my muscles are going to die" feeling went away.  I asked my husband when you stop trying to push through the pain and discomfort.  His answer?  If you're having a heart attack. 

Once again I need to advice people that I am not a doctor, nurse, fitness trainer or health expert of any kind.  Please see your doctor (blah blah blah) before attempting any strenuous exercise.  I am just a fat mommy trying to lose weight and help others. 

Yeah, I totally plan to put this legal disclaimer on all these posts.  I am not going to get sued for silliness.  Seriously, you should know your limits.  If you have a heart condition you really shouldn't be exercising without a doctor's supervision anyway.

I didn't plan for this to be so many blog posts, but I hate really long posts.  I'll be back tomorrow to write about my strength routine.

Get With the Program

Disclaimer - Not actual author shown

So, I said in Saturday's post I've finally found a workout routine that is working for me.  My first wise advice to impart on anyone trying to lose weight is this - You need a fat burning program and you need to watch what you eat.

I thought for years that walking alone would do the job.  It is considered heart healthy to walk every day so why isn't that good enough?  Because if you suffer from a low metabolism (which as a woman ages her metabolism becomes lower and lower) the only good way to burn fat is get your heart rate up.  The only way you do that walking is if you power walk and there are hills involved.  Even then you may never hit your target heart rate.

I have spent the last two months reading about metabolisms, hunger, meal portions and BMI.  I was so tired of the scale not budging.  Or I'd lose a few pounds and then it would come right back.  I have yoyo'd between 200 pounds and 197 for almost 7 months.  Before that it was 210 and 200.  I figured at the rate I was going in about 10 years I might get to my target weight.

So how did I change?  It didn't happen overnight.  This need to get in shape has been with me for 3 years.  I've wanted it but not had the energy or the tenacity to go for it.

You will not have the energy.  I can promise you that.  That is the pitfall to exercise.  You won't have the energy when you start out, the energy may come in 3 days or may be 3 weeks.  It will be there, but not right away.  It is very hard to get off the couch, turn off the TV (or computer) and instead go for a run or do some sit ups.

It's not just hard to start but you have to find a program.  I'll be more than happy to share my program, and it should work for all women.  But it's important for you to understand that you don't have to use my program.  You just should to use a program.  If you have something organized and laid out for you with a schedule it's harder to turn it down, to forget and to procrastinate.  It holds you accountable, and accountability is a big part of working out.  Find a fat burning program that works and stick to it.

As you can see I learned a lot these last few months.  It's too much to impart in even two blogs so there will be much more to come.  I want to share everything I learned so that others don't need to research for months like I did just to understand the way our bodies work and how fat burning works.

For now I will detail the basic program for fat burning that I'm using.

Monday - Strength Routine

Tuesday - Cardio 30 to 45 minutes

Wednesday - Rest

Thursday - Strength Routine & Cardio 30 to 45 minutes

Friday - Cardio: Interval Plan (your fat melting workout)

Saturday - Strength Routine & Cardio 30 to 45 minutes

Sunday - Cardio 30 to 45 minutes

Note some important things here.  Do not ever do a strength workout two days in a row.  You're muscles need a day to rest after a strength workout, otherwise you can seriously hurt yourself.  A  cardio routine is any exercise that gets your heart rate up.  If you like workout video's use one of those.  I used running. 

Interval Workout, your belly melt, what is that you may ask.  It's a special routine that changes your metabolism so that you continue to burn calories for up to 48 hours.  At least that is what studies have shown.  I'll do a special blog about that later.  I'm going to complete a full series this week about my new workout routine that will hopefully help everyone else.

Also, as a CYI, please see your doctor before performing any exercise or diet program.  I am not a licensed doctor, nutritionist or health expert.  I am simply an overweight mommy trying to help others.

You may be asking how my second week weigh in went.  I lost 1.8 pounds this week, making it 5.8 in two weeks.  Also, I have to comment that I have my period, which I always retain a ton of water no matter what I do.  So I'm pretty proud.

The Long Hall

Disclaimer - Not my actual hall.

The year has flown by and I suddenly realized that I have been seriously neglecting my blog!  I constantly think of things I want to write about but then never find the time.  This year has marked a great deal of new parenting experiences for me.  Everything from potty training, to preschool and as usual losing weight and depression.

I've done so much research regarding preschool and potty training that I think I have stored up enough information to write a whole blog about both.  Separately.  So I won't address those here today, I'll touch on them later.

When it comes to losing weight and depression I have some good advice to finally impart on both of those fronts.  As you may know if you're a frequent reader of my blog I have struggled with both ever since having my daughter 3 years ago.  I've had what can only be viewed as a miraculous breakthrough over the past 2 months that I plan to impart here over the series of the next few weeks.  I can only hope that my experience can help others so that maybe they will not need to struggle for 3 years like I have. 

I feel like I have lost 3 years of my life.  Gone to depression and sadness.

Sorry about the downer in this entry, but I feel the need to shock others into taking action.  I needed that myself, and had no one to do it to me.

Why is this called the long hall?  Well, the final part of this re-introductory post is to touch on how I'm losing weight.  I've struggled not just the last 3 years with weight, but my whole life.  I've always been like a yoyo, but never so overweight that I have high blood pressure and pre-diabetic.  That is where I have been since having my daughter.  Over the years I've tried so many fad diets - weight watchers, slim fast and calorie counting.  I've tried and failed repeatedly at exercising.  I walk a lot, and have always walked a great deal throughout my life.  Gee, at least my heart should be healthy, right?

At the beginning of June I received a magazine from my mother in law called prevention.  It had a detailed work out in it that outlined how someone who is sedentary could lose weight, and specifically target their belly fat.  It was a special plan laid out for women because our bodies respond differently than men's to exercise.  I tried it and over the whole month of June lost 6 pounds.  I felt better, I looked better.  Sadly I fell off the wagon at the end of June because my brother came to visit.  I got back on it 2 weeks ago and have done even better.

Tomorrow I plan to write another post about how I'm doing it.  I lost 4 pounds last week and tomorrow is my official weigh in for this week.  So far, I have lost 2 pounds this week! 

The long hall?  I find the hardest part about being parent is actually finding the time and place to exercise.  Sure if I was rich I could afford a babysitter just so I could run or go to a Zumba program (assuming  could even afford that).  But I'm not rich.  In fact I don't even fall onto the scale as middle class.  My family is considered in the low income area.  That makes these things more difficult.  I started out trying to get my cardio by doing those DVD's on Netflix for exercise, like dance workouts.  That is impossible to do with a toddler underfoot and I quickly discovered that not only do I not have rhythm but I have the exact opposite.  My dreams of being a prima ballerina are down the tubes I guess.  I don't live somewhere where I can go running outside.  I can't go to a park, first of all they're all at least a 20 minute drive away and I can't afford the gas everyday but honestly I really just didn't have enough motivation to get in the car and go somewhere.

The long hall.  I began to run in my house.  You heard me right and no I don't have a treadmill.  I have a hallway that meets my greatroom.  It's exactly 20 passes.  I began to run that.  Using the couch to 5K system (I'll talk about that more tomorrow) I was able to get off my butt and go for it.

For the first time in my life, I'm running.  I've never been a runner.  I have a bum knee and hip issues from my pregnancy.  But I'm running!  Granted I will not be in the Olympics this year but I may someday participate in one of those 5K's for a charity.  I feel great and feeling great means more to me than seeing the numbers go down on the scale.  Well, maybe...

I'm going to finish there for today.  This is a pretty long post but I guess I had a lot to write about.  I'll be back tomorrow to do my second official weigh in and to detail my workout and diet plan more.

Back on the Horse

The writing horse that is.  I’ve been very lax about writing lately, from my blog to my professional writing that I normally do.

There are a lot of reasons for this.  Mostly it’s because I’ve been spending a lot of time playing with my daughter and working on preschool skills with her.  Also more time with hubby.

Also, this is my 100^th post.  I had this huge thing worked up where I was going to write this amazing 100^th post.  Yeah that is part of the reason that I haven’t written.  Well, guess what post number 100?  Instead you are being turned into a regular old post so that I can stop thinking all these silly grandiose ideas and get on with writing stuff I want to write.

And there you have it.  Watch out writing world, I’m back!

The End of a Saga

 17 years ago one of my close friends lent me a book called Daggerspell by Katharine Kerr.  I was 15 or 16 at the time and loved to read.  I had pretty much gone through every fiction book in the school library and since my Aunt and Uncle weren’t readers so they never gave me money for books.  At that age I was willing to read anything.  I was well known for sitting in class with a book under my desk while teachers lectured or sitting and reading while I ate my lunch.  I was definitely a book worm.  When Rose Martin gave me that book little did I know that my life be would changed forever.

No, it wasn’t a self book or anything crazy like that.  It was the first fantasy novel I’d ever read.  I wasn’t raised in a geeky family.  Alright my dad watched Star Trek but that is about it.  So, I had no exposure to a geeky culture.  I loved that book.  Then I found out that it was part of a series.  I was so excited! 

Well that series finally ended last year.  I know that is a lot of books.  The series has 15 books in it but it truly is amazing and epic.  When I bought the last book I decided not to read it until I had reread the entire series.  So in December I set to the task.  Last night (I used to be able to read a lot more but I do have a kid now) I finished the final book with a sigh of happiness.  Normally when a series ends I’m sad or depressed to be losing the characters that have become like loved ones to me, but instead I felt happy that they resolved their lives and that it was over.  Also that she actually finished it, lol.

If you have never read the Deverry Series by Katharine Kerr then I highly recommend it.  But it’s not for the faint of heart.  It’s a sweeping saga that spans over 11 lifetimes and 1000 years.  Also, there is close to 20 characters whose lives you follow.  This is a smart series for people who enjoy epic fantasy. 

It took me many more years to actually realize that I was a geek, but I feel like Katharine Kerr was the beginning for me.  Well her and Final Fantasy 7.

What’s next?  The Hunger Games.

New Home

I’m happy to report that the reason I have missing is because I’ve been unpacking and adjusting to my new home.

Our new home is huge, much larger than we originally thought once we got our stuff into it.  We’re happy to be rid if the “Mouse House” and living in our new, mouse free, home. 

The new house has a wood stove and we are learning how to heat our house with it instead of heat.  It has a heat pump too, but it’s amazing how great you feel when you make your own fire.  And the marshmallows that we roast on it are pretty awesome too.

Now that I’m done I’ll be able to get back to posting more often.

STOP SOPA/PIPA

It’s everywhere and I feel I need to add my voice.

I completely understand what the federal government is attempting to do.  Piracy is a very bad thing and I think it does need to be stopped someway, but this is not the way.

If you don’t know what SOPA/PIPA is then please go here to read about it.

Basically it would give the government the right to censor any website that they choose as long as they say it is piracy of some sort.  So, quoting a song or posting a picture of a famous person would get your site shut down.  You would have no trial, no attempt to explain yourself; you would just be shut down.

This is not the way the internet should be, or anything in this country. 

First Amendment of the Constitution

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances.

So, today I join thousands of sites in protest of SOPA/PIPA.  This will be my last communication on my blog or any other form of social networking.

Please go to Wikipedia today, find your congress person and tell them how you feel.

For the Birds

I have been extremely absent from writing these past few weeks and it’s certainly not because I have nothing to say, in actuality I always have way too much to say.  It’s because we got our wish and we’re moving.

Okay, well that probably wouldn’t have been the wish.  The real wish would have been for a magic fairy to come to our house; kill the mice, fix the vents and get rid of the cockroaches and stink bugs (I caught another today, yay).  But since that wasn’t going to happen (fairy’s don’t deal in the death of other living things for some reason) our landlords were nice enough to offer us the ability to leave our lease.  We weren’t going to jump at it unless we found another place that we liked, which surprisingly we did very quickly.

So, we’re moving… again.  All of this migration is for the birds, seriously. 

Anywhoo, I just thought I should let everyone know that I’m not dead, I swear, and that I will be back to regularly writing blogs about everything and anything that annoys, bothers and interests me very shortly.

I’d say wish us luck.  But at this point I’m just wishing for a house that isn’t broken or infested.

Depression in our Loved One’s & Spouses

Depression is a disease

My best friend made a post the other day regarding depression and it brought me back to thinking about this topic again.  I know I've posted about depression previously and my battles with it, but I was thinking about depression and how our loved ones deal with.  I also saw a commercial the other day about people with depression and how it’s not just about them getting treatment on their own.

Depression is also about acceptance and getting help from our loved ones.

I’m a big believer in medication but I think that should be joined with therapy sessions.  But one thing people don’t think about is that depression doesn’t just affect the person who is diagnosed.  It affects the people in their life and those people in turn affect them.  If someone doesn’t know how to treat a person who suffers from depression then the symptoms can be made worse, even with medication, thanks to the misunderstanding of that one individual.

I think that depression is a stigma in our society that needs to stop.  1 in 5 adults suffers from depression.  Why is it something we’re all so scared of even though it’s more common than cancer or diabetes?  By not talking about it we make it an uncomfortable topic for the people who do suffer.  Also, I’ve noticed that some people think it’s funny when I say they should take a mental health day from work.  I’m not joking.  Mental health is important and if you’re stressed then you probably need more than just a 2 day weekend.  I see nothing wrong with calling off sick to work because you’re mentally unwell, as long as you don’t make a habit of it.  Of course if you’re making a habit of it you should probably see a doctor.

So, that commercial I was talking about showed people walking with someone beside them.  One person had a sign with a type of mental illness and the other said something like shoulder to lean on.  It’s very true.  Everyone needs that certain someone to go to, but a mentally unhealthy person needs it even more so.

If your spouse or loved one suffers from depression there are resources out there for you.  These resources will help you learn how to cope with their illness and give you tips on how to help them.  Here are two sites I found that are really great for this Depression & Relationships and Living with a Depressed Spouse.

I can tell you from personal experience that having the people you love support you is very important and essential to your mental wellbeing.